There is a universal yet unwritten rule among people who date online: if someone doesn’t respond to your initial message, it means they’re not interested. Sounds pretty simple and straightforward, right? Most people get it and are just fine with it. However, some people get a raging ass bee in their bonnet over it. And when I say “people,” I mean men. Mostly men, anyway, because men initiate contact more often than women.
It’s no secret that women receive far more messages online than do men. So many, sometimes, that it’s hard to keep up. I’m not saying this to sound high and mighty or whatever, it’s just the truth. And men get frustrated that the vast majority of their messages go unanswered. In fact, a lot of dudes get pissy and claim that if they took the time to write a message, women should at least have the courtesy of replying, even if it’s to say we’re not interested. Like this guy:
But here’s the thing. As I said, we get a shitload of messages. It would be extremely time consuming to respond personally to each one, which is why we normally just defer to the universal rule mentioned above – no reply means not interested.
Now, I’ve been on the other side of the coin as well. I’ve sent messages to guys, received no reply and, yes, it bites sweaty, donkey ass. However, it bites donkey simply because they’re not interested, not because I think they’re lowdown, motherfucking dicks for not replying. No one likes rejection, der. But I deal with it and move on. They don’t owe me anything.
So I began to wonder, what would happen if I actually replied to all of these men? They say they want a response, even if it’s to politely decline their advance. But how does it REALLY feel when you read those words of rejection? Probably not too fuckin’ good, TBH.
So I tried it. I responded to everyone, nicely. This is what happened.
Some guys were totally OK with it.
Or even appreciative.
Others thought it sucked.
A couple guys wanted a lengthy dialog about why I wasn’t interested.
Seriously, ain’t nobody got time for that.
Some behaved like 8-year-old boys.
Others totally hit below the belt.
And some were horrifying, evil, fire-spitting swamp monsters.
Welp, my question was answered.
Now that this little experiment is complete, I am going back to the unwritten rule, and dudes are just gonna have to suck it the fuck up. I’m sorry if a few bad apples ruin it for the nice guys, but why on earth would we allow ourselves to be subjected to this kind of abuse just because someone’s goddamned ego was too precious? That’s a whole lotta OR NAH.
Guys, you are not entitled to a response. We don’t even know you. We’re not trying to be rude, we are just trying to be efficient and to protect ourselves from immature, unwarranted insults.
So, next time you encounter a man who rants indignant because they haven’t received a polite decline, feel free to send him the link to this page. Because, frankly, this here scum slut has had enough.